Welcome to the circus, aka the second day of 500 words per day. Yesterday I talked about what inspired me to write 500 words a day. I even shelled out two book reviews which you can read here and here. I was definitely in a flow state.
I thought long and hard about todays topic. These 500 words are not supposed to be random. They’re supposed to be for me to articulate my thoughts, opinions and feelings. Book reviews are an easy way for me to do that but, unfortunately, I don’t read one book a day. On average it takes about 3 days and that’s only if the book is really good. Currently, I’m reading The One by John Marrs and while it is a good book I know it’s going to take me the better part of a week to finish.
Anyways.
I knew I wanted to talk about this particular situation because I was so enraged when I read about it! The thing is, these are real people and this is a real case and I definitely don’t have all the facts or information. So, please remember everything is alleged. I’m merely speaking on my thoughts and feelings of the allegations made. I almost wondered if I should choose a something different to write about but NO THANK YOU! The way this story invaded my thoughts all day, I had to share them with someone else, someone like you.
So what are we talking about today?
THESE MOTHERFUCKERS
You’re looking at Abby Bradstreet and Brady Burr, a couple out of Kansas who “allegedly” made the 4 year old daughter of Brady Burr stand outside in the cold wearing only her underwear because she wet herself. But, no that kind of disgusting abuse wasn’t enough for these two, they made her watch through the window as the rest of the family decorated the Christmas tree. And, because that wasn’t enough they also beat her with a slotted spoon and made her eat dinner in the bathtub.
These two seem to really like isolation don’t they?
When I read the article this morning my stomach turned. There were so many things about this situation that I couldn’t fathom a sweet little girl experiencing and the effect it could have on her for the rest of her life. Christmas, which is supposed to be the most magical time of the year (especially when you aren’t responsible for buying gifts) absolutely forever tarnished by the memory of this event. Can you imagine the thoughts and feelings she must have had? Told she didn’t deserve to participate in decorating the tree because of a minor accident? Standing outside in the cold in only underwear for anyone to see? Eating alone in the bathroom. A FOUR YEAR OLD! As an adult I’m not even sure how I would have processed the situation.
I think that for the rest of my life, every time I saw someone put the angel atop the Christmas tree my mind would revert right back to this moment. I’d be looking through the window at my family decorating our tree while I stood basically naked in the cold.
Christmas would never be Christmas again.
Situations like this piss me off for so many reasons but, let’s start with the most prevalent one BAD DADS. That’s right, judging off the information in this story, the dads girlfriend is the one who had the bright idea to lock the girl outside in freezing temperatures. Plus, the older child stated she’d hit them before. EVERYTHING ALLEGED of course. Regardless of everything though the point I’m making is WHEN WAS DAD GOING TO BE A DAD? When was the father going to do his duty and protect his daughter instead of going along with the abuse and allowing it to escalate? When would enough had been enough? Too many parents let there significant other (who have no biological relationship to the child) cross the line.
Too many parents turn a blind eye to what they know is wrong, what they know is abuse and then you see them crying in court when they kid is dead. Thankfully, in this case the child is still alive but I’m almost positive if this kind of stuff went unchecked it would only continue to get worse.
There are plenty of cases were reports and arrests are made but the children are returned to the home. Which I’ve always considered absolutely insane. There are times when you can tell it’s not ever going to be in the best interest of the child to return. In this case, there’s no way in hell they should ever allow this girl to be around her father or his girlfriend (current or otherwise).Obviously, I wasn’t there, so I don’t know and can only assume but – Brady Burr obviously either actively participates in the physical abuse and humiliation of children or at the very least condones it. Both of which are a problem. But again, these are just allegations. A story that popped up in my newsfeed and sat with me all day.
Truthfully, this article made me think about my own life. No, I’m not talking about abuse because I wasn’t abused. I’m talking about if I were to die tomorrow and my husband moved on, what would happen to our girls? Would he believe them if they said daddys new girlfriend hit them, screamed in their face? Would he be easily swayed into turning a blind eye because of infatuation or desperation for help? I wonder what it is that makes a man allow this kind of treatment toward their kids. Is this something only a certain type of man allows? How do we pinpoint the red flags on it?
It’s baffling -science needs to be done.
But I have a question about the whole thing. The 4 year old girl had an accident and wet her pants. I’m assuming this happened in the middle of the day, right? So, what could have caused it? Did she have to use the bathroom but maybe someone else was using it? Was she scared and had the accident? Is she special needs and it’s genuinely an accident -something she can’t control? And also, what kind of monster jumps to punishment and humiliation?
My 6 year old recently wet her bed for the first time and the thought never crossed my mind to punish her. My first thought was to ask her what was going on. She said she was scared because it was dark. We know she’s scared of the dark which is why we keep a light on for her in case she needs to get up in the middle of the night. This particular night my oldest child wanted to sleep in the living room and turned off the light. Now we were clear on what caused this accident to happen. Next, I offered her a solution if she wakes up scared again and needs to use the potty but it’s dark and that’s to call out for me or dad. Simple. We haven’t had another issue.
It’s ridiculous that grown adults can’t function like grown adults. Their immediate response wasn’t to nurture this situation, find the cause, find a solution. No, their instinct was to harm this child. What lesson could she have possibly learned from the route they decided to take? Truly, I had so many thoughts and questions about this all day. But, I don’t want to ramble on too much.
Thanks so much for reading! See you next time